I Got's Me A Woody

I like Woody Allen movies. Actually, I LOVE Woody Allen movies. My friends don't quite understand this pecidillo, but they are quite tolerant of it. They think that it is just one more item in my trunk full of idiocincracies. I do have one friend who is as big a fan of his as I am however. When Woody's name comes up in general conversation many people say that they don't like his films because he is a pervert. What I don't understand is why people hold artists to a different standard than most other professions. When I go to a resturant, I don't care if the chef plasters his bedroom wall with pictures of buxomy women. I just want him to prepare a good meal. When I see my doctor, I don't care if he wears black silk panties and rubs his wife's butt with lime Jello. I just want him to know what he is doing medically. The same thing was done with our last President. Never mind that he balanced the budget and enacted some great legislation. He did some kinky things with a cigar and a woman who was not his wife. I guess that negates everything he accomplished. So, is there a list of professions where these standards are held and a list of professions where they aren't? Put me on the mailing list please.

No Faggets Pleeze

The Texas House just passed legislation - it goes on to the Senate - preventing gays from being foster parents. Arkansas did the same thing once but a Judge ruled it unconstitutional. Now my personal experiences with gays adopting kids has been very positive. Let's see....these are kids who have come from destructive, abusive home situations going into positive home situations. So what is the problem? Ah, bigotry and ignorance wields it's ugly head once again.

Check Those Privates

Now that Dub-Ya is no longer distracted by the Terry Schiavo situation he can go back to sticking his nose in ANOTHER area where it does not belong. Privatizing Social Security. He thinks that by allowing people to place their money in the stock market they will be securing their financial futures. It may be more sound to put their monies in an even safer place.... like Lottery Tickets. As Forrst Gump said......."Stupid is as stupid does."

Thanks Melanie

Either I am slowing down or it is getting harder and harder keeping up with Dub-Ya's goofs, gaffes and general screw ups. Thanks to my Cuz-A-Mel for alerting me to his latest act of diplomacy. Apparently there was going to be a small delegation representing the United States at the Pope's funeral. Then there was a change of mind and the group got larger. Let's see.....There were the two Bushes, President Clinton, President Carter................wait, when did President Carter have the sex change operation that transformed him into a black female? Oh, that was Condelesa Rice. They forgot to tell President Carter that the plans now would include him. Now Georgie, didn't your mama teach you any manners?

Rick James: She's A SUPER FREAK

Those wild and wacky, tasteless and tacky FREAK-A-ZOIDS have packed up their bibles and their trumpets, put them in their K-Mart shopping bags and have left their vigil out side of Terry Schiavo's room. May she FINALLY rest in peace. Now, since I don't receive the FREAK-A-ZOID News Letter, I don't know where they are going to be next. Let's see - these people have protested A.I.D.S. funerals, lied in wait to shoot doctors who perform abortions - I have NO idea where they will appear next. Don't these people have ANY shame?

This May Sound A Bit C-A-R-A-Z-E-E

I just had an off the wall, wild idea. Why don't these FREAK-A-ZOIDS that I refer to do some thing CONSTRUCTIVE? Volunteer some time to help out an over worked, under paid teacher in his or her class room? Visit some people at a retirement home? Donate blood? Pick up some trash on the interstate? I know that this would require them to crawl out of our collective butts, leave their homes from under the rocks where they reside. But they could do some thing other than torment a brain dead woman, protest at funerals or take target practice out on doctors. I know, I know................I'm just thinking like a crazy person.

Hillary - Our Next President

I LOVE Hillary. She is going to make a great President. Perhaps the problem that people have with her is that she is both INTELLIGENT and COMPETANT. So here is an idea for a bumper sticker for both Democrats AND Republicans. It says "Run Hillary Run" Democrats put it on their back bumper.............Republicans on the front.

Gay Marriage

A California judge just ruled that banning gay marriage is unconstitutional. The matter now has to go before the State Supreme Court before being ratified. Of coure this immediately brought all the religious nut case ministers out of the wood work to codemn this abombination. Since the fall of Communism in the 90's these "Men Of God" were able to fuel the hatred and bigotry of their faithful flocks ( as well as fuel their bank accounts ) by condeming THIS afront to American decency and morality. Excuse me while I go throw up on a picture of Jerry Falwell.

SHOCK SHOCK SHOCK

Grab your tranquilizers. Call "Ripley's Believe Believe It Or Not." I finally am going to say something positive about Bush. Oh wait, it's LAUREN Bush. She is a New York fashion model who happens to be the niece of Dub-Ya. She has been doing work for the U.N.'s Relief Fund - setting up anti hunger and education programs in various impoverished areas around the world. Her work is both positive AND effective. Perhaps she can give her 'Ol Unk a pointer or two.

BOO

You know what scares me? Knowing that there actually are people out there who watch "The Jerry Springer Show"

Hold On.....Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson is ALL over the news regarding his child molestation charges. BIGGER Michael Jackson news would be if he had a hit record.

Those Wild And Wacky Republicans

First, they sold the American people on Richard Nixon. Then, they convinced the American people that Ronald Reagan was their man. Now, they have given us George Bush. Hey, I know somebody who wants to get rid of his orange Pinto. Give it to the Republicans. Apparently they can sell ANYTHING.

George "Dub-Ya" Bush

When George W. Bush entered the White House in 2001 this nation had a monetary surplus. We now have a national debt of approximately 7 Trillion Dollars - the highest in our nation's history. The reasons he had us go into Iraq have been proven to be unfounded - Iraq has NO weapons of mass destruction. Meanwhile more than 1,500 brave and courageous Americans have lost their lives there. Our reasons for remaing there are unclear. BRING THE TROOPS HOME GEORGE. Bin Laden, our nation's number one enemy remains at large. Gasoline prices are at an all time high. Hate crimes are at an all time high. He keeps Donald Rumsfeld - WHY? His plans for Social Security reform are sketchy at best. I have one question. What the Hell were those red state people thinking?

Can We Say.....H-Y-P-O-C-R-I-T?

"Dub-Ya" is rushing back to Washington in order to sign emergency legislation to "save" Terri Schiavo's life. She is the "brain dead" Florida woman who's husband decided that it was long past due to end this woman's suffering. Never mind the husband's decision. Georgie knows better. So, if he is so concerned with the sanctity of life, what motivated him to sign HUNDREDS of Texas inmates death warrents? And I thought George was only an incompetant President. He's a hypocrit too.

"COPS"

I guess that my life is slowing down. I only saw two ex-boyfriends on "COPS" this week.

SURPRISE! Larry Pontificates

The ONLY thing that people dealing with personal trans-gender issues should be getting from others is encouragement and support. Instead, they often have to deal with the ignorance and bigotry of a narrow minded segment of the population. If dealing with achieving a "balance" in their lives is not challenging enough, trans-gender people oft times have to deal with the prejudice that is inflicted on them. Here's an idea. Those who have a problem in dealing with issues of trans- gender should have a picnic.....charter a bus and head to another planet. We don't need or want these bigots on ours.

Republicans...............The NEW Democratic Party

I always thought that Republicans stood for LESS government while Democrats stood for MORE government. So, why are the Republicans spending money hand over fist and interferring in prople's personal lives so much? Hey Georgie, those fundamentalist freaks DO own toilet paper. No need for you to be licking their butts so much.